"You Look Healthy": Reflections on Mental and Physical Health

Oh boy. Three years without a single blog post, and this is what gets me back into the saddle? I will say from the outset to brace yourself - this post is a complete technical, Microsoft no-go zone. And I’ll be covering some pretty triggering things on mental health. But I need to say this. And, I hope what I have to say is relevant to anyone working in the industry today - regardless of who you are, what you do, or where you work. I’m grateful to Nigel Hughes for giving me the push to get this down in writing, and to other community members, like Chris Huntingford and Nick Doelman, for having the guts to share their own stories, warts and all, in public.

Let’s start at the beginning…or, more correctly, the title of this post

“You look healthy.”

I’ve heard this phrase, or variations of it, quite a few times since I got back into the 2025 fall event cycle, seeing my friends and MVP colleagues at fun events such as the Power Platform Community Conference (PPCC), Microsoft Ignite, the European SharePoint Conference (ESPC) and more. It’s always meant as a compliment, and I love to keep hearing it. I guess the reason it keeps coming up is that, over the summer, I lost nearly 3 stones (19kg) in weight. I still struggle to believe it. But I’m happy about it. And the journey is by no means over.

As much as I love people complimenting me on my efforts, the above is a somewhat loaded statement. Because what’s the opposite of healthy?

Unhealthy.

And I was. For around two years, if not more. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present to you Exhibit A and B:

(You can blame the hair colour, which is in no way unhealthy, on some rather mischievous Germans and their fantastic fundraising efforts at ColorCloud 2025 😛)

Let’s take a step back and review. Christ. Look at the state of it. Not healthy. You don’t have to beat around the bush. These pictures are a sign of an individual who has let go of themselves, does not respect themselves, and, despite how they may appear and communicate, is the opposite of happy.

Taking a look at some more recent photos, I think the difference is night and day:

Looking at these photos makes me happy after a long time of not being happy. I’m proud of what I’ve achieved. But I need to recognise and accept the state of mind I was in, learn the appropriate lessons and make sure I don’t fall back into the same traps as before.

Recognising the signs

Winston Churchill often spoke of the “black dog” that would visit him from time to time. Low points. Moments of “depression”, for lack of a better term. I can in no way equate my own struggles to the monumental task of defeating Nazi Germany, but the experience and its description align with what I felt - more than I would have cared to admit in the past, to others or even myself.

Perhaps to take a more modern spin on things, at (what I now recognise to be) one of my lowest points last year, I constantly had the following song on repeat:

MGMT - Little Dark Age (Official Video)

A great tune. But why did I keep listening to it? The lyrics resonated. Take a moment for yourself to read them here. Lines like:

I grieve in stereo The stereo sounds strange You know that if it hides, it doesn’t go away

I was having my own “little dark age”. Despite some significant accomplishments from a professional standpoint - becoming a shareholder in my own practice, attaining the Microsoft MVP award for the first time, and having the opportunity to see the globe - I was struggling personally. I was unhappy. I was unhealthy. I was ignoring myself and my own well-being. And I was on a path that wasn’t going to end well.

So, guess what? Got the same, sorrowful tune on repeat? Got that feeling that something is “off” with you, but can’t quite explain it? Then you’re in the same boat as I was. And I implore you - talk, or do something about it.

I want to break free

I was in a bad state - no question about it. And I was perhaps scared of recognising this myself. Two things helped me to see sense and to start carving a way forward:

• Waking up and smelling the coffee: Let’s not beat around the bush. I was obese and unhealthy. My eating habits were appalling, the comments, sometimes in jest, sometimes less so, from friends and family couldn’t be ignored any longer. I wasn’t doing the bare minimum on myself - so how could I expect my outlook on things to be any better? I needed to make a change, invest in myself and respect the person that I am. And that starts by making radical change - in lifestyle, physical experience and more.
• Simple acts of kindness from a stranger: Never underestimate how a few simple words or a brief shared experience can transform your outlook. I’m not going to embarrass the individual in question by naming them here, but after a brief introduction and experience with them at a community event, my outlook immediately started to improve. It made me realise there are many good people out there, and the importance of just being kind to others, regardless of who they are or how long you’ve known them for. I will be eternally grateful to the individual in question, who helped me “see the light in the tunnel” and set me on a better path. If you’re still sceptical, then I think Waymond from the movie Everything Everywhere All At Once says it better than I ever could:

What’s working for me

Every day brings its own set of challenges. Things don’t quite go as expected. Something small or big can knock you down. But I’m now very much a pessimistic optimist. Despite what may happen, I know I can control my own future and that my daily, incremental actions will help me get to where I want to be. Here are some of the things that have helped me along the way; I share them now in the hope that they are useful to you too:

1. Get yo’ Steps In!: You hear about people hitting the gym, doing all of the exercises, yada yada yada - and still they don’t lose any weight. Activities like running can also have potential long-term side effects if you’re not careful. So I decided to focus on a walking target instead - 10,000 steps a day. That’s just over 4 miles and, at a steady pace, should take you around 90 minutes to complete. If you can’t find 90 minutes in your daily schedule to do this, then you’ll never be able to prioritise your health. So make the time. Usually, I will wake up around 5 AM and squeeze most, if not all, of my steps in before starting to work. Then, depending on whether I’m out or working from home, the rest of the steps will fall into place as the day progresses. So try to aim for this as a starting point. There will be days that will be better than others, and days when you don’t quite make it. But get it into your head each day - I need to walk, and I need to make time for it.
2. Gamification FTW: I’m a ’90s kid, conditioned on years of Super Nintendo, beating the level and earning “rewards”. Relying on this, I can try to introduce a “fun” aspect into my daily exercise. Here, I need to thank Marijn Somers for introducing me to the Pikmin Bloom mobile game. I’m just about old enough to remember when this first came out on the GameCube, so there was a nice little nostalgia factor kicking in there. The purpose of the game is to grow your Pikmin and spread flowers across the world. How do you do this, I hear you ask? By walking! The more you walk, the more Pikmin you grow, and the more flowers you spread. In conjunction with the previous point, it provides a fun (and somewhat addictive) way to get your steps in, while also growing your own little Pikmin garden. You can even take photos of your walks, share them with your friends, and see where you have been travelling. This helped me to get past some of the “drudgery” of walking for the sake of walking, especially in the early days of my new routine.
3. Intermittent Fasting: There’s a reason I think why the act itself forms an important part of so many world religions. And it also has proven health benefits. On a normal week, I fast from Sunday evening through to Tuesday evening. From there, I then follow my chosen diet plan stringently (see the next point). It’s very tough to do if you are not used to it. You will drive yourself crazy with the aches and hunger pangs. But drink plenty of water, have the occasional (black) coffee, and you can get through it. After a few weeks, you will adapt, and fasting will become almost second nature. The premise and concept that we must have three meals a day is a complete falsehood. Our bodies can easily go without food for many days. Do you think during the hunter-gatherer days, we were scoring a big “kill” three times a day and gorging ourselves silly? Of course not. So, recognise this simple fact of our biological make-up, and try it for yourself.
4. Keto Diet: The basic premise of this diet is to limit the amount of carbohydrates you eat and increase your fat and protein intake. This forces your body to enter a state of “ketosis”, where it burns fat for energy instead of carbohydrates. As a carnivore, it worked really well for me. I could eat a whole chicken and then a beef steak, and not get set back at all. But if you’re a vegetarian or a vegan? It might be more of a challenge. Cutting carbs from your diet is hard, as you realise just how pervasive they are in the food chain. I’d invite you to take a closer look and, of course, fully evaluate the pros and cons before you decide to do it yourself; but it worked wonders for me.
5. Switch your Drinks: I enjoy having a tipple. For those who know me, probably not a huge surprise there 😅 But I got into a nasty habit during Covid of drinking beers, lagers and other carbohydrate-heavy drinks. Socially drinking, in my bedroom, in a house that I hardly left, due to the lockdown. No wonder I put on so much weight. So to be faced with the prospect of dieting and not being able to have a drink filled me with dread. But it’s still possible to enjoy having a drink, in moderation and if you’re willing to switch things up. 1 pint of beer typically has around 15-20 grams of Carbohydrates. A slimline Gin & Tonic in comparison? Around 2 grams max. A glass of champagne? About similar. So, with careful, regulated planning, you can still have a bit of fun on a Friday night without throwing your hard work during the week out the window.

Looking to the Future

I’m on a journey. There are still things that I need to work on. I need to make myself more emotionally available, less of a closed book. I need to improve my interactions with others, including my close friends, work colleagues and family. I probably still drink too much (can’t blame the half-Irish in me for that one). I’ve got about another stone (6-7kg) to lose to get rid of the last excess weight. Most importantly, I need to respect and be happy with myself, to help forge stronger, long-lasting relationships with others, including what may become my next significant life partner, wherever she may be. But I wanted to celebrate my success and give the confidence to others that it is possible to make such a significant change, even if it seems challenging from the outset.

OK, you’ve heard enough about me. The key thing is - we are all on a journey. The biggest lesson from my accomplishments over the year is that fixating on the end goal rarely makes you happy when you finally get there. Focus instead on the small things, what’s along the journey, what you can do in small increments today to get you into a good place. Reward yourself at the appropriate moments; don’t be a complete and utter puritan.

And most importantly, be more like Waymond. Be kind to yourself and those around you. Make a positive difference in the lives of the people that you meet. It could be the most critical thing you do for them that day, that month, or even in their entire life.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. I hope what’s written here helps you deal with any struggles you may be having and get you onto a better path. Please do reach out to me at any time if you want to chat about anything that has come up for you in this post. I’d be more than happy to hear from you.